THE LONG DARK TRAIL: Where To Begin?
Every now and again, an indie film crosses our path promising much more than it is capable of delivering. An intriguing poster. A clever log line. Well-captured cinematography. Spit and polish to deflect from the extensive tarnish the viewer is duped into enduring. Such is the case with The Long Dark Trail by writers and directors Kevin Ignatius and Nick Psinakis.
To preface, it’s easy to simply tear apart a film made by the Hollywood system, what with their massive budgets, A-list actors, and effective promotional campaigns. Though, with independent cinema, one must consider the restrictions creatives face at every turn. But these issues can’t always excuse simple, avoidable mistakes. For some, a bad film is simply thus despite any production hurdles.
Wake Me When We Get There
The premise revolves around two brothers, Henry (Carter O’Donnell) and Jacob (Brady O’Donnell), who have endured years of brutal physical abuse from their alcoholic father. Living in the desolate woods of Pennsylvania, the boys decide to escape their situation in order to track down their mother who left them to join a Satanic cult somewhere in the forest. Not a bad beginning to a coming-of-age horror. Alas, beyond this, The Long Dark Trail has very little to offer.
Dull does not begin to exemplify just how monotonous the film plays out. Despite the stunning landscape cinematography peppered throughout, the imagery cannot elevate this ho-hum screenplay. Much of the blessedly short 1-hour 18-minute runtime (which felt endless) is watching the brothers ride bikes through the countryside, walk endlessly through the woods, or stop to deliver the most cringingly stunted dialogue since a first-year film school class.
With more walking than in The Lord of the Rings, nothing happens, until it does. And even then, nothing seems threatening or prescient at any point.
This Is How People Talk
A large part of what makes The Long Dark Trail so laughably hard to take seriously is the acting. Or, rather, lack thereof. The entire cast, most notably the O’Donnell Brothers, are not actors. It feels cruel while writing this, but after abiding by stoned-faced expressions and lines read as robotically as the old Charlie Brown specials, the film loses any reality the filmmakers intended. Every line plays like a first read-through, emotionlessly pausing to succinctly say each word as if being a child learning phonics.
Minus the abusive father popping up mostly in flashbacks, the entire screenplay is “say, don’t show”. Whenever a character speaks, the result is a garrulous plot dump to relay what could have just as easily been a poignant scene. Instead, any action is there to lazily pad the length.
Are You Scared Yet?
The horror in this film is less than and then some. There are a couple of blood splats and gore to be had, a rough bit involving an iron, and that’s about the worst of it. However, the makeup effects were solid. For instance, when Henry’s neck breaks out into yellow pustules, it definitely makes one itch. So, there’s that.
What followed, on the other hand, made me guffaw. This is not a euphemism. An unintentional gut laugh emitted from my person.
The scene involves a hallucinating Jacob finding Henry, his face covered in sores, staring menacingly at his little brother. The visage of Jacob’s decayed sibling begins to multiply, stepping out from behind the trees in a decent enough composite shot. Creepy enough, right? Suddenly, the real Henry finds Jacob. Convulsing on the forest floor, foaming from the mouth, the shot begins with a close-up of Jacob’s face while slowly panning back to reveal (wait for it) his left leg up behind his head like he was going to light a fart on fire.
You had to be there.
Tells Us What You Really Think
What is so boggling about this film is the script. The idea was there, struggling against a current of unrealistic dialogue recited by unseasoned actors, pointless downtime, and a lackluster conclusion. Even when the boys finally do find the cult, the finale is so rushed it feels like they didn’t have an ending in mind. This could have played more as a horror version of, say, Stand By Me, with fleshed-out characters who the audience could get behind and a plot worth following, Ignatius and Psinakis instead stuff the plot with pretty scenery to distract from the lack of narrative.
To its credit, this is a visually gorgeous film. Rich, powerful, brightly lit scenery engulfs the screen nearly throughout. Quiet breathtaking. Unfortunately, the serine landscape does nothing to run a chill up your spine. Especially when the title says otherwise.
I truly can’t recommend this film less. From the maddeningly slow pace, amateurish performances, and undercooked screenplay, The Long Dark Trail fails to do anything it set out to accomplish.
The Long Dark Trail was released on January 26, 2023!
https://youtu.be/fw6LPFYx8sUWatch The Long Dark Trail
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