Death is never an easy task when depicting within a film. The pain, loss and trauma can resonate off-screen, rippling throughout the audience – reaching deep into emotions and memories we have or will have experienced at sometime. Sometimes cathartic, sometimes heartbreaking, the loss of a loved one on screen can also make or break a film. Sadly, for 3 Days With Dad from writer and director Larry Clarke, the latter proved to be true.
3 Days with Dad was a painful endeavor, lacking any cathartic moments of fatalities, unity and farewells. Its lack of focus makes it a hard film to sit through, the lack of connection with characters disengaging an audience – a fault that the film struggles to ever rectify. If I were to be honest, a short film medium may have elevated the content of 3 Days with Dad, raising it above the harsh morbidity of death and how it befalls a family.
Farewell
3 Days with Dad begins with a funeral. Having lost their father days earlier, their tearful goodbye shifts between the past and the present. Almost immediately, the flashbacks between father and son are harsh, judgmental arguments and remarks instantly poisoning a film that slowly seems to present no sense of absolution or resolve beyond regrets and final words. It felt as though there was a set up for a moment of enlightenment for the two, a chance for a father and son to find absolution in the face of death, yet from the very beginning there is a sense that even if it finds its fruition, recognition will never come.
Other flashbacks to family gatherings display the strength of unity between them all. While an investment in character and family development for the film, a chance to make them relate able to an audience, the attempt seems forced at times – and the comedy it is suppose to infuse here fails to find its footing, leaving awkwardness and confusion for audiences.
One of the film’s biggest struggles was focus. There is a point where as a viewer, you begin to question who is the real focus of the story. First, it is the story of the family, dealing with the loss of their father – as well as their relationship together. After a bit, the story shifts, and it seems it is the story of an aging man faced with the decisions of mortality, holding on with deaths grip to himself, refusing to compromise who he. As the film shifts into the second half of the film, it begins to become clear that the story is of his son, and his journey, through the death of his father, to find his place in the world and embrace the responsibility of adulthood. Needless to say, I was at times as confused as the film seemed to be.
Where it all went wrong….
I wish there had been more of a centralized focus on who the film was about. While it could easily involve each, a better sectionalization and unity would have been a success. Honestly, a film surrounding the final days of a person’s life did not need to muddled by the complexity of unknown fatherhood, long lost friends, and school reunions. It was the expectation entering the film, ready to embrace the awkward and solemn nature of families (we all handle death differently) saying goodbye, that adds to the confusion.
Beyond the muddled confusion, the film is listed as a comedy. There is only one instance of the film that comes to mind that fits this description. Overall, the infusion of comedy within 3 Days with Dad falls flat – and at times borderline disrespectful. I could see where the filmmakers were trying, but it did not read in the final execution. It did not jump off the screen and it did not make me laugh. Without the humor, the film was weighed down by its subject matter – one that many who have had to care for and watch their loved ones leave may find too real.
Though I do not want to leave the film on a sour note.
What Worked
While many of the performances presented were forced and rigid – and not the kind of rigidity one would expect considering the films subject matter – there were two that genuinely stood out, rising about the material they were given to work with. First, there must be a shout out to actress Lesly Ann Warren, whose performance as a grieving widow was the closest to perfection. She handles the many stages of grief interlacing with the unpredictability of the human spirit and mind in the face of saying goodbye. The wife of Bobby Mills (aka Dad), she brings an erratic, strong willed, supportive and even lost character to life. She is all encompassing and the character audiences will find the most relatable in one way shape or form.
It also must be mentioned that the best moments of 3 Days with Dad are when J. K. Simmons arrives on screen. There is a skill and confidence when he is on screen, one that carries his scenes and infuses the much needed comedic relief the film is so desperately lacking. He brings to life the enigmatic, kindhearted and free spirited mortuary employee in training. His introduction and presence brings the successful execution of the scene where the family is faced with utilizing a pet crematorium. On paper, neither seems particularly humorous, but when you are watching it in the context of the film delivered in the aura of Simmons, it is the best scenes within the entire film.
3 Days with Dad: Conclusion
It is difficult to a review a film that does not speak to you, that does not meet expectations or does not live up to its potential or promise. There is a lot of work that goes into a film by all those involved, yet a bad film is a bad film. 3 Days With Dad does not deliver to the audience what it promises, presenting an exercise in patience that goes one day to long.
Have you seen 3 Days With Dad? What did you think? Let us know in the comments below!
3 Days With Dad was released on VOD on September 13, 2019.
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